Where I've been, what I've been up to and where I'm going. Come along for the ride...
It's been two years since I've recorded a video or written a blog post for my Makeup Mai World family. When I decided to step away it was a gradual process which I never intended to be for long. So I thought I'd catch you up on what's changed in my life, what I want to do with my channel and hopefully you guys will enjoy the new direction.
Where I've been...
When I started my YouTube and blog site I didn't think about how interacting with viewers and readers would affect me. I just loved makeup, loved being creative with it and wanted to share with others. It was an escape from work and the stress. Then...
I allowed the hobby that I had so much fun working on to become another stress in my life. I was trying to be unique with content, I wanted to film more, and I wanted to make viewers happy. Then I was recording videos I wasn't thrilled to put out just to get something out. I was making mistakes when recording and forgetting to turn on the mic or losing footage. It just stopped being fun because I started putting too much pressure on it instead of just putting out content when I wanted and was proud of. With working full time, filming and trying to have a life, I ended up frustrated with everything. Finally, I started letting comments get to me. I'm a fairly confident person and don't usually care what people say or think of me. At first I was like "Oh, they don't know me or are just saying things to get attention" and then it became "Am I too fat or boring or (fill in the blank)". Things were becoming toxic for me and I just stopped. What came next was even worse...I felt horribly guilty. I made friends on my platform and felt like I abandoned them. It was like no matter what I did I was going to feel like crap. There was no winning and so it was easier to ignore it.
My Life
Since taking a step back from YouTube and blogging I have made quite a few changes in my life. I no longer work for the same hospital system I did before. I decided that I wanted to move to a place that made me feel happy and less crazed all of the time. So back in 2016 I made the move from Los Angeles, California to Bozeman, Montana. So many people have asked me, "Why Montana?" and I can honestly say it's because I love it. I had been visiting the area for years to spend time with my best friends and their family and during one of those visits I decided that is where I wanted to live. From the point of making up my mind about moving to actually spending my first night in my new home was about six months and when you think about it, that was pretty quick to completely uproot your life. I was leaving behind my family and friends in California to move somewhere completely different. Now I would have to learn how to drive on icy roads, shovel snow and have fewer shopping options. However, the trade off was that I lived somewhere slower paced, with gorgeous landscape, my best friends down the way and a new start. This is exactly what I needed.
The first winter in Montana was a tough one with tons of snow, trying to work remotely and missing family that I was used to seeing everyday. But I've always been someone who likes their alone time and with my puppy Monty I had the best roommate and coworker on earth. As I survived my first winter I was blessed with an incredible spring and was able to witness the seasons change (something that isn't obvious in Los Angeles.) My first summer brought family visiting and reminded me of why I love Montana, the rivers and its Big Sky. I was able to learn more about myself over the past two years and know that I am very self sufficient, have grown in confidence, love my family even more than I thought I could and have grown closer to my best friends through more trials and tribulations than we thought possible. I have never regretted the move I made and now also have family wanting to join me in Montana.
What's next?
Makeup Mai World is changing...it's more about my life and what makes up "Mai" world and what makes me happy.
Over the past two years I have missed my channel, subscribers and sharing my life with those who really connected with me through makeup, hauls and just honest chit chat. The channel is going to shift its focus and will include everything and anything that makes me happy. Whether that be something I'm painting, something I'm cooking or something I'm wearing. I'll be throwing in vlogs if I want to bring you along on a fun trip or save a memory I'm making. There will still be the occasional hair, nails and makeup videos but it won't be the sole focus of my blog or channel. I guess you can say I'm welcoming you into more of my life and I hope you can grow with me. I want to spread positivity and build a strong Ohana via these platforms. If you're interested in beauty, lifestyle, positivity, and my random babbles, please come along for the ride.
You can always reach out to me via any of my social media platforms or use the Contact Me page and drop me an email. I can't wait to start this journey with you guys and hope you'll have as much fun on this new path as I do. See you in my next post.
Me Ke Aloha Pumehana,
Hawaiian for "With the warmth of my love"
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